SEATTLE—In an effort that was intended to be subtle but was clearly targeted, local cat Arlo reportedly followed pet owner Joshua Rice around his apartment Friday like a racist Walgreens employee making sure a customer wasn’t going to steal anything. “That asshole thinks he’s being discreet, but I can see him staring at me as though I just pocketed an $8 deodorant,” Rice said of the 3-year-old cat, who trailed him through the kitchen, hallway, and bathroom, peeking around corners so as not to let the man out of his sight for one minute. “I could feel him singling me out the moment I walked through the door. I took one step toward the cabinet where I keep the treats, and I saw him lurching towards me. It’s a little messed up, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t used to it.” According to reports, when Rice headed toward the exit, the cat placed one paw on his leg as if he were an irate security guard demanding a customer empty his pockets.
Cat Follows Man Through Apartment Like Racist Walgreens Employee
https://theonion.com/cat-follows-man-through-apartment-like-racist-walgreens-employee/
The Onion Staff
Nov 14, 2025 ·
1 min read
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