Nobody 2 is vindication for the first film’s critics: uninspired, unfunny, and despite its bloody, relentless efforts, it’s boring. Please god, shut this door.
Nobody retooled the Taken formula for the John Wick generation: take an unorthodox action man (Bob Odenkirk) and pit him against a nonstop barrage of bone-crunching, splattering violence. It also had a dash of suburban comedy, a neat soundtrack, and Christopher Lloyd as a geriatric gunslinger.
Was it one of the best action movies of all time? No, but unlike its over-choreographed, post-Wick contemporaries (The Old Guard, The Grey Man, Bullet Train), it was lo-fi, practical, and it had an angle: the cathartic arc of a scrappy everyman who can’t resist bloodshed, not a reluctant assassin.
Also – and this is important context – I’m an action junkie, and as a staunch defender of the first film, I was the easiest mark for a sequel. And yet, here I am, relaying the dispiriting experience of watching it.
What is Nobody 2 about?
After Hutch (Odenkirk) burned the Russian mob’s ‘obshchak’, he now works around the clock paying off the debt settled by his handler (Colin Salmon). He handles odd jobs with one constant: he kills people, usually in gruesome ways, and he’s always late for dinner.
Things aren’t great at home. His wife Becca (Connie Nielsen) keeps fighting the urge to resent him, and his eldest son is embracing his dad’s dark side on and off the football field. So, he decides to take his family on a summer vacation to Plummerville, a sunny holiday town from his childhood.
Alas, as he’s told, “wherever you go, there you are”, and it doesn’t take long for Hutch to get into trouble, eventually attracting the attention of Abel (Colin Hanks), the local sheriff with a chip on his shoulder, and Lendina (Sharon Stone), the psychotic kingpin of the town’s criminal activities.
Nobody 2 is a rehash dressed as a riff
Hutch weeding out a small town’s corruption feels like a nod to Walking Tall (though it’s not as shrewd or all-out fun as either version – yes, this means the Rock’s remake is the better film).
Also, Plummerville, complete with a water park and all of Hutch’s father-son memories, is basically the movie’s version of Walley World, though the Mansells aren’t even comparable to the Griswolds; their sense of character is wafer-thin.
But the sequel’s pleasant change of setting can’t hide its biggest weakness: it is effectively a repeat of last time, whether it’s Hutch beating up some goons, setting money on fire, or teaming up with his brother (RZA, who gets a decent scene) and father (Lloyd) to fight the bad guy (or, in this case, gal). Excusing some trite, badly written scenes between Hutch and his son, and the eye-rolling inevitability of everything with Hutch and Becca, it’s the same movie.
Derek Kolstad (the architect of the John Wick series) collaborated with Aaron Rabin on the screenplay, and it’s little more than a vehicle for Odenkirk flexing his action muscles, like a direct-to-DVD sequel without the charm of a bargain-bin gem.
That’s not to say it’s terrible – it is bad, though, full of stilted, try-hard dialogue that can’t fill its shallow depths. It’s male wish fulfilment – like a lot of action films, and that’s okay – but here it gets old quickly.
Nobody 2 still has good action, don’t worry
If anything, it’s a frustrating result for director Timo Tjahjanto, an accomplished, phenomenal director with an eye for glorious, knuckle-whitening fisticuffs and gunplay. This is a stain on his filmography, but he still gets to do what he does best: craft good action.
Except… it’s not his best work (it’s certainly not on the level of The Night Comes for Us or The Shadow Strays). Some ropey fire effects aside, it’s relatively well-staged, and two set-pieces stand out: an arcade brawl where Hutch uses a guy’s head for a whack-a-mole machine and an amusing fight on a “duck boat.”
It’s just not enough; emptily gnarly bloodshed that’s a bit too silly. It doesn’t help that everyone is either phoning it in or struggling to deliver a convincing performance. Stone is extremely underused (her character isn’t interesting anyway, so it’s not exactly a waste), Nielsen gets some of the worst lines, and Odenkirk is likable enough to not make it completely unbearable.
Kudos to Hanks, who delivers a sh*t-eating, smarmy performance befitting of Nobody 2’s influences. Whenever he’s on screen, the movie comes alive – if just for a minute or two.
Nobody 2 score: 2/5
Nobody 2 should have been a sure thing: an action sequel that ups the ante with a great director and a beloved frontman, and a Hollywood icon as a villain.
But it’s not: it’s a watchable disappointment, or as a fellow critic described it after the screening, “a load of nonsense.” Tolerances will vary, but to borrow the words of Tommy Lee Jones, I couldn’t sanction this buffoonery.
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